Chapter 4 – 2016 was a roller coaster

He was at the peak of his weight loss and everyone started to notice how good he looked, very muscular, and he welcomed the attention. I was proud of him.

I also lost some weight and although I felt good about it, he thought I could do better.

Our son was diagnosed with Nephrotic Syndrome – it’s a kidney condition that causes the body to excrete too much protein in the urine. It was a very confusing and emotional time for us as we knew nothing of the condition. We had to educate ourselves and come to terms with the fact that our son will be on chronic medication maybe for the rest of his life.

In some way, this brought us closer to each other. He spent less time on himself and focused more on us.

For the next few months as we adapt to our son’s condition, our relationship improves, he gets less angry about silly things, and I feel more at ease to lose the weight, and I do.

I feel more confident in myself, I feel good, I just shed about 15 kg, I’m involved with a big project at work, but it meant I worked extremely long hours, getting to work early, leaving late, but he supports me, how awesome is he?

I do notice he was more attached to his phone, more to himself, and he talks to me when he has to, lets me sleep late and skips time at the gym. I am going to lie if I said I did not know what was going on.

My gut told me he is up to something. I saw he changed his password on his phone, a lock on his Whats App and Gallery. I knew what was going on, but was afraid to confront him, only because I wasn’t ready to face the reality of the truth, so for a month, I kept busy with work hoping that I am wrong.

On the 27th of November, he had a work function, and he asked me to help pick out what to wear because he said: my opinion matters. He comes home a little drunk with take-away food. Both are unusual because he does not drink and he does not eat junk food.

He had the biggest smile on his face when he got home. He kissed me hello and spoke in detail about how his work function was, saying that he had too much to drink and stopped to get food because he was still hungry.
There was nothing out of the ordinary with his story. I believed him. He said he needed to clean the car because he spilled a drink. Again, nothing wrong.
During that week, he just seemed different, happy. I would find him on his phone in the middle of the night, and he would say that he couldn’t sleep. He encouraged me to work late that week, saying that he has everything under control, that our son is fine; but, I needed to tell him when I left work and when I am 10 min from home.
What a good husband, I have, so concerned for my safety, a cup of coffee and a plate of food awaited me when I arrived home. Can my life get any better??

It was on the 03rd of December. The early summer heat didn’t allow me to sleep past 7 am. I woke up to see the bedroom door closed, at first I thought he closed it because he didn’t want to wake me, but my gut told me otherwise.

I got up, opened the bedroom door slowly, peeked in the lounge to see him on the couch, glued to his phone.

“Who the fuck are you chatting to?” I asked.